Sometimes You Have to Walk in Someone Else’s Shoes to Find Your Sole

As young women we have a tendency to look at others and imagine just what it would feel like to walk in their shoes for a day. Growing up my grandmother would always tell me to get out of her shoes. When I would come home each and everyday I had grown accustomed to putting on her huge slippers and walking around the house. She wore a size 11 and I wore a meager size 5; but it made no difference. Her shoes were big but somewhere inside I believed I could walk in her shoes. When she would catch me she would tell me; “I have some large shoes to fill” I would always laugh and continue to track around the house in the beautiful boats that my feet had grown so accustomed to. As I got older and continued this ritual it began to really make sense. I wanted to be her; I walked in her shoes everyday after school because I admired her and felt that if I could just walk in her shoes I could be like her.

We were very much a like; we had the same first name, loved to help others, and were genuine to each new person we encountered. She always had a story to tell, and I, always had a story to write. Walking in her shoes gave me a little insight into who she was in a figurative sense. She wore her shoes well but I always wondered had she really walked in her own shoes? If she had truly wore her shoes and hers alone she would have to have been superwoman. You see she came to America at the age of 21 with no friends, relatives, and little direction. She had undergone much hardship in her home across the seas and God had viewed her favorably and provided her with options of being bigger then what the island had dreamed her to be. She made a career in helping others. She made others happy by making them look good as she designed fresh digs, and administered beautiful styles of the ethnic mane. She worked in housing and supported those who couldn’t speak up for themselves against slumlords. She raised her 4 children as a single parent after her husband’s demise; and sent three of them off to college. She later raised 4 grandchildren from her youngest daughter and assisted with rearing the children of her other offspring. She was a nurturer, medium, genuine friend, and empathetic individual. Her shoes would be large for me to fill, but they would never be too big for me to aspire to.

In life most times our aspirations come from somewhere outside of ourselves. There is nothing wrong with aspiring to be just like your mother, grandmother, Mrs. O your 7th grade teacher or any other female you find favorable. However; as we aspire to be like our role models sometimes we forget to look at the soles of our shoes and congratulate ourselves for the things that we have achieved. Our aspirations are the goal, but it is each step that we take in this finite life which will later map out the paths of our soles. We often aspire to walk in others shoes and that is well and good; let that be your motivator; yet never forget the strides you have made and eventually you will see that the motivator (someone else’s shoes) will be the soiled foundation which your own two feet will stand. As both shoes sit side by side you may be a lot a like but it is the path you have taken that will always differ. So imagine yourself in ‘grandmas’ shoes and identify your own path.